Colder Weather Returns

I forgot how much colder it is up here in the pacific NW. But I am adjusting without too much difficulty. I was concerned the cold weather might affect my boys a little bit (boys being a euphemism, not my children). When it's colder, they tend to hug the body a little bit more. Sometimes, the cramped conditions can spur on some racking paid, especially on that left side.

But so far so good. No problems yet with that. However, I still can't bring myself to wear tight fitting trousers. I do have a pair of tighter jeans and the last time I wore them, I must have accidentally racked myself at least two times. So I try to stick with looser slacks, kacki's or sweat pants.

One thing I've learned, once you have PVPS or probably any type of testicular pain, you don't want to crowd them too much.

My pain lately has been improved, since my "Indian-style" sitting mishap. I had a slight twinge of racking pain Saturday morning, but a day of hiking cured that. Like I've said throughout this experience, walking seems to help. Probably a blood flow thing or a nerve entrapment thing. Regardless, walking is good...at least for me it is good.

Interestingly, my lower back has hurt more than anything else lately. Sometimes there seems to be a connection between back pain and PVPS pain. I've heard some guys on the forum relate some type of vague connection. But my PVPS hasn't been anything out of the ordinary, despite the lower back aches.

We're going to join some kind of a gym up here today. In case it gets too cold to get activity outdoors, I'll have some place inside to turn to. They have a gymnasium and the usual treadmills, etc. I'm hoping to mix it up a little bit instead of just getting on the treadmill. We'll see.

Treating the Pain Like Any Other Pain

Every once in a while, I think of the pain I have. Well, actually I think about it all the time, but what I mean to say is, I try to think about the pain like any other pain. For instance, what if I had chronic nerve pain in my arm or calf. Would I be as annoyed by it? Would it dominate the landscape of my life? Why can't I just think of it like it's an old sport injury from college?

I think the problem is because a sports injury is an acceptable part of the game. There's a chance you might end up with a twisted knee or high ankle sprain or worse. I never knew the world of PVPS even existed. The concept of chronic pain or inflammation was never explained to me when I made the decision to have the snip or the reversal. So it's hard to keep in the same frame of mind. But I try nonetheless.

What kills me about the nerve pain is that I got it after my reversal. So in a way, I feel like I made a bad decision on top of an already bad decision. Like throwing good money after bad. This is turn creates a certain degree of beating oneself up. Not the best place to be mentally considering all the other garbage going on.

Today, I find myself recovering from a Saturday hike in the woods. Like an idiot, I tried to move a small tree that was obstructing the path of our vehicle. My wife and kids helped me, but I gave it a good strain. (Another bad decision). Anyway, I didn't feel any pain then, but I did feel a little pull in my groin yesterday evening when we arrived home.

This morning, I'm back to wearing the athletic supporter. I keep getting breath-taking pains whenever my left testicle moves forward and up within my scrotum. I have taken it easy today - to say the least. I'll probably take an ibuprofen tonight and then reboot tomorrow with a gentle walk around the neighborhood.

I've also had right sided inguinal pains, but nothing to write home about. So it's been two relatively good weeks before I screwed it all up yesterday. That's one of the tough things, when you're not having pain, you think you can do all the stuff you used to be able to do. It's a subtle trap that catches you off guard, when you're not paying attention. Then "whammo" you do something stupid like try to move a log off the road.

But, in trying to keep a little perspective, like I talked about last time, I will read a little more in my Bible and pray a little more to God. I just found out that a lady was praying specifically for me all week long last week. Not surprisingly, I had one of my best weeks in a long, long time. Time to get back on my knees and go to the Lord for some more help.

Distractions Can Be a Good Thing

Woke up early for a men's bible study and am just now getting to bed. I've been awake almost 18 hours. It has been a long day. But a day where I actually felt normal. We went on a little hike at 5000 feet. My son got a headache and had some chest pain. As if I didn't have enough to worry about with my health problems. So we came back down to sea level and went on a day hike. We set up camp, had a campfire and grilled hamburgers and hot dogs. All the time, I didn't really notice any pain.

I think being busy doing something you like to do helps with the pain. You probably don't notice the twinges as much. I'm sure I probably had them, but I didn't really dwell on them if I did. I've experienced this similar phenomenon before. If I'm really busy doing something, the pain doesn't seem to bother me as much.

This just goes back to the idea of how chronic pain can play mind games with you. That is, if you keep yourself occupied, the little things aren't noticed. Now, I will say this...the knifing nerve pain is always noticed, no matter what I'm doing. I've heard men report making love with their wives and then being in incredible pain with PVPS. Now if you were to be distracted, being intimate with your wife would do it.

Anyway, I enjoyed today's distractions. It helped me feel like a normal person today. Oh and by the way, today is my wife and I's 17 year wedding anniversary. I've enjoyed almost every day. The PVPS has created challenges, but the good Lord has helped both of us through them.

So a shout out to my wife...I love you darlin'. Looking forward to another 17 years, this time hopefully with less PVPS symptoms - Lord willing.

Steep Hike Was Rough

I just had something clarified yesterday. Walking good, steep hiking bad! Just when I thought my walking program was helping me to get in shape, I had an experience which humbled me quite a bit. My wife and I went fishing yesterday, but couldn't find a private spot, so we decided to go hiking instead. We wanted to take advantage of her day off from work and the weather was gorgeous, mid 60's with lots of sunshine.

We found a trail that had the right distance (2 miles) but was a little steep (20%), er make that a lot steep. We got about 12 minutes into the hike and I was huffing and puffing, my heartrate was somewhere around 120. Meanwhile my wife, who works out all the time, is yawning as we walk up the steep trail. What a contrast. I finally had to tell her, with wounded pride, that I couldn't go up any more and that it was time to turn back.

There were two reasons I needed to turn around. The first was my pitiful physical shape. That is directly related to the pain I've had related to my reversal. I haven't been able to be very (aerobically) active because of my previously described nerve pain. My aerobic threshold is still pretty low, despite the increased activity recently. I can tell I have a long way yet to go. Lord willing, I'll be able to get to the point where I can tolerate these kind of hikes in the future.

The second reason I was struggling on the hike was due to the groin pain I was experiencing with every climbing step. I remember when I started an exercise program in June with my kids, that squats seemed to cause me a lot of nerve pain. Well, picture this climb so steep that every step was like a semi squat. It felt great to use my leg muscles, but my groin was not enjoying itself.

I'm just glad I didn't let my pride get the best of me. I probably could have pushed through and then I'm sure I would have been in tremendous pain today. If this hike had occurred last year, then I know I would have let my pride hang me out to dry. So I think I'm make progress with my pride, thanks to God. He has really been showing me that pride is at the root of so many bad decisions.

So as it turns out, I had just a little left inguinal nerve pain last night when I laid on my left side. Then today, when I sat down, my left inguinal area experienced some more nerve pain. So lesson learned. I'm going to stick to flat surface walking/hiking for the time being. Who knows, maybe I'll be able to get my heart in shape, and by then, perhaps, my inguinal area will be less sensitive to such experiences.

Don't Sit Still

It's official. Sitting still during the day is a figurative death sentence if you have PVPS. The more inactive I am, the more nerve, knifing pain I have. The more I move around, walk, hike, stand, etc. the less pain I have. Yesterday after church we piddled around the house, but I vowed to my family I wouldn't get on the computer, hence no post yesterday. After lunch we went hiking and picked wild blackberries. The jaunt took about 3 or 4 hours. I got home and started making a blackberry cobbler, while my wife worked at getting dinner ready. We finally sat down and ate dinner at 7:15 pm last night. That was the first time I stopped to rest all day.

It hit me that I hadn't had any nerve pain all day. I actually felt normal and forgot I had PVPS. It was a great several hours. To be lost in activity, not thinking or "dwelling" on PVPS, was a wonderful thing. Those moments are special for anyone who suffers from chronic ailments. Just feeling normal. Wow, I kind of took it for granted before all these health issues started rearing their ugly heads in my life.

I also went walking today. It felt great. It felt so good that I actually considered running. But I knew better than to push myself too much. I've only been walking for a week and I should probably keep up that regimen for several more weeks before I consider doing anything else. But I am encouraged. My pain has been dramatically reduced through this walking routine (with less sitting) I've started. I thank God for this decrease in pain.

Lately I have felt inspired by the Lord. Maybe convicted is a better word, but I really feel like I'm being prepared for an important work up here in our new surroundings. I don't know if it will be something in the medical field, in ministry or in education. But I feel his presence in a way that I can't remember. Very humbling I have to tell you. Now, if I can just figure out what it is. But as we're learning in our bible study, whatever "it" is, will probably become known without me having to "do" anything. Perhaps this walking is to prepare me for whatever "it" is. I just don't know yet, but I do know that God is good. I'm certainly in his debt for all his blessings and grace.

Need to Make a Change With My Computer Chair

This computer stuff has got to change. I can't keep sitting in this chair unless I want to be in pain all the time. I think it's time to join the 21st century. Time to get a laptop computer. That way I can sit comfortably on the sofa and blog, create lessons for the kids, etc.

I spoke to my wife about this yesterday. I think we're going to get a laptop and call it a Christmas gift to each other. Maybe we'll get it earlier than Christmas but still call it a present. Not sure yet. But I know I can't keep doing what I'm doing. If I want to have good days that last all day, then I need to make a change. Sitting seems to be a big nemesis. One that I can control. The walking has been great. Although I won't be walking today.

Instead of walking, we're going on a day camp. Which means we'll be hiking and standing a lot. Hopefully, that combination will work for me. I also hope the walking I've been doing this last week will give me a little more endurance for the day camp.

I did have some scrotal pain last evening. Mainly because of the computer time spent in this poorly designed chair. I woke up with this same tight feeling below my belly button, that I had yesterday when I woke up. Since I won't be on the computer very much today, I'm guessing (hoping) my pain will be consistently low level today. But I will be driving a ways to get there to the camp site. Who knows. We'll just have to wait until the end of the day.

About As Expected

The hiking yesterday went as expected. I wore a jock just in case and took the tylenol just to be safe. By around 1 or 2, the tylenol had worn off and the nerve pain was back. I took off the jock and changed into some gym shorts from my jeans. I felt a little better afterwards, but not much. My wife had to drive us home.

Last night, I woke up around 2 a.m. having significant nerve pain on my left inguinal side. Today, my right side just kind of aches and my left side seems ok. I'm not sure what to do. Maybe a hot bath, maybe my wife and I need to be together more frequently (or should I take things into my "own hands" sort of speak?).

I'm kind of at a lost. Perhaps there is nothing I can do. Maybe it's just a cycle that I need to go through. The storm before the calm. Kind of backwards, I know, but that's all I got.

Another Hike

Despite the inguinal nerve pain, life goes on. Today we're going hiking about an hour and a half away from home. That means time in the car and then the hike. Not sure how things will turn out. I will probably take some tylenol and/or ibuprofen before we head out.

I slept ok, but did a lot of stretching this morning before I got up. If I remember correctly, whenever I do a lot of stretching in the bed prior to getting out, I tend to have a lot of pain during the day. So I'm not sure what kind of day today will be. I'm hoping that since I've blogged about what I expect to happen, the opposite will occur. I know, I know. I can't explain this reasoning. That's just where you go when you have chronic pain issues. I'm not proud of it.

I just pray the pain doesn't keep me from enjoying my family and what the Lord has created. Have to cherish each day - you know what I mean??

Trying to Stay Active

One reason we moved out of the searing Texas heat, was so our family could be more active. I think we've done pretty well so far in the week and a half we've lived in our new home. For instance, today we played, explored and hiked around a river. The kids had fun finding fish frye and throwing rocks in the river.

I did a lot of walking, bending, throwing and stacking rocks. Now later in the day, I feel pretty good. No real pain to speak of down there. I think being here will be a good thing. My body may not be ready for hard physical labor or exercise yet, but it's looking like "normal" activity may be back in the cards for me. I've even been wearing jeans. I know that doesn't sound like much, but I haven't worn jeans since last October, 10 months ago. It seems like I've been wearing basketball shorts every day for quite a long time now. It's been nice to change it up a little bit. I'm still careful when I sit down though. I don't want to get too crazy.

If anything can be proved thus far, it is that walking seems to do a body good, at least my body. So, we'll try to keep hiking and exploring. Then maybe I'll be up for the more rigorous treadmill at the gym.

Before I forget, this morning I had that "full" feeling again on my right side. Still haven't had a release in quite a while, so maybe that's why I'm feeling that sensation.

After the Hike

I tolerated the hike pretty well. No pains while I was up in the mountains. Today, I feel pretty good after the hike. No weird sensations (yet) and no pains. I also forgot to take a pre-emptive tylenol yesterday before the hike. So, all told, I think it went pretty well. I'm optimistic that our next hikes will go well too.

Today, we've been cleaning up our new rental house and still looking for nooks and crannies to put all of our stuff from our move. Daunting work for sure, but it needs to be done. No more furniture needs moved and no heavy boxes so from a straining standpoint, I think I'm in pretty good shape.

We'll see how the next couple of weeks go, now that we're a little more settled into our house. We will visit a church tomorrow (Sunday). I'll be curious to see if we can find a church like the ones we're used to attending in the south. That's about it for now.

Going Hiking Today

Still had some of that cutting sensation in my right testicle again last night. It even woke me up. Maybe I just need a release. My wife and I haven't been together for a while, so maybe that will be the cure. Sometimes I've seen my symptoms on my right side go away after my wife and I have been together.

Anyway, we're going to go hiking on one of the trails today. I think I'll take a tylenol beforehand, just to see if it keeps that cutting pain down a bit. The ibuprofen doesn't really seem to help with that pain, I've noticed.

Once we get settled, I'll have to find a urologist up here that specializes in PVPS or at least, has heard of it and dealt with it. I did like my urologist in Dallas, but I think he and his partner had just never seen PVPS before. There is a doctor at the University of Washington medical center who is a specialist, although I heard recently he is not taking new patients. But perhaps, his partners are. I don't know yet.

Time to go hiking I guess. I'll keep you posted.