It has taken over two years since my reversal, but I am now employed! That may not seem like a big deal to most readers of this blog, as it wasn't the reversal which kept me from working, rather our personal choices with regards to our family. However, as a result of those choices, I have been unemployed for these last two years.
I'm not sure I could have been working with these PVPS pains that I had been experiencing since my reversal. Oh, I probably could have gotten by, with pain killers and the like. But I'm guessing it would have made a miserable time even more miserable. My heart goes out to those men who have jobs and various responsibilities that become compromised as a result of PVPS. I've heard many horror stories of men losing jobs because of their PVPS. I'm not sure why I was able to plod through this situation without that added burden. I'll say this, I've never been very thick-skinned. What I mean by that is, I've never been able to handle adversity with much grace. If things got a little overwhelming, and I mean just a 'little', I had a history of cratering. It really has never taken much to throw me off my game, to borrow a sports cliche'. I have always hated that about myself. But as a kid, I never had any adversity - so I guess I never learned the skills necessary to handle it when it came.
I know I get a little preachy, okay, a lot preachy, here sometimes but this is just another example of how the Lord works in my life. I last posted about cycles of pain. How I go through longer periods of relatively little pain followed by brief, short cycles of bothersome pain. I just finished up one of those longer periods without much pain. Interestingly, the brief cycle of bothersome pain, was very brief. In fact, it was only about a day long. Getting up and moving/walking is all it took to overcome it this time. I never even took a Tylenol or ibuprofen. So couple this new development with a job which will have me on my feet quite a bit, seems like a real blessing.
And I think I've grown quite a bit - mentally/spiritually/character - in the last two years. I think the Lord had to deal with me in such a way to show me that I don't have to handle the adversity on my own. I can simply turn it over to him and then trust that he'll take care of me. This has been a hard lesson for me to learn. You know, looking to the future, I'm sure I'll have to adjust to a whole new set of pains that will come my way as I suddenly am thrust into the land of the living, but I am confident this job came along at just the right time, because I wasn't prepared for it before.
On a side note, while I was experiencing this past long cycle without much pain, I noticed a change in my wife and my intimacy levels. We were much more frequent in our time together. Kind of the exception for us, but it was great. I really love my wife so much and we, for whatever reason, were able to connect quite a bit. So perhaps the increased activity in the bedroom helped my pain cycle lengthen (in a good way).
I make this point because this is my journal, albeit public as it is. I write to remember, to explain, to help me figure stuff out and maybe, hopefully, to help someone else.
In any event, it looks like I'll be working after my vasectomy reversal. It only took two years.
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