Into the future I go. I suppose there is no where else to go. This online journal has been a great way for me to keep track of my symptoms. I was able to identify cycles of pain, look for cause and effect, and track the intensity and nature of the pain. I've been recording this data for over a year now, since my vasectomy reversal.
I've been a member of the yahoo forum for PVPS sufferers for close to a year and a half. Those guys and gals have been through so much, just like me. A lot of their stories are worse than mine. Their pain seems to be much more pronounced and debilitating, although, mine has had its moments. I continue to pray for those who suffer from PVPS. Sadly, there are new members to the forum, monthly. All have the same story, to some degree I mean. They all had a vasectomy and now their world is turned upside down.
We all frantically look for answers, solutions, tips...anything that will take the pain away. I love to read stories about how some men were able to have a procedure which enabled them to become pain free, but unfortunately, those stories are too rare. Most guys just talk about getting back to 80, 85, or even 90% of their former self.
It has been over 18 months since my reversal, so I thought I would provide an update.
Physically - I am not in the greatest of shape, because my activity still isn't normal. I have a fairly sedentary lifestyle. However, it is picking up a bit. We live in an apartment complex that has a swimming pool, exercise area, and tennis court. I've been able to get back on the treadmill, I swim at least once a week and I've played tennis once or twice - with athletic supporter in place.
My pain is confined to nondescript flashes of pain in the inguinal area that rate a 1-2 on a 1-10 pain scale. I also get a racking pain in my left testicle which rates a 4-5. This pain is triggered by E.J.s, lifting anything heavy and doing squats. I think it may be a type of hernia or it could be nerve pain. I'm not really sure. The last type of pain is a nerve pain I get on the tip of my penis. I've had it a couple of times and it is just flat out disturbing. It rates a 4-5 and can last all evening.
Mentally - I'm doing better. The pain has weighed less on me lately. I've kind of just adjusted to it. I no longer freak out when I have a blast of nerve pain. Instead, I just kind of think, "Oh, okay. Just a bit of pain." Now that would probably not be the case if I was still having those sharp knifing pains, but the last couple of months have been better. The chronic ache on my right side isn't even noticeable, most of the time. So that has helped me quite a bit on the mental side.
Spiritually - Let's face it, we're all sinners. That will never change. I still need my Lord and savior Jesus to get me through. But since I've kind of surrendered this to him, it hasn't been as bad. Coincidence? Maybe. But I like to think that God has helped me have a stronger relationship with him because I had to go through this PVPS thing. I truly believe that my faith wouldn't be nearly as strong as it is, if it weren't for PVPS.
So yes, I'm actually praising God for this syndrome. Crazy, I know. But who can argue with God. It's like this, those without faith in God, think those of us with faith are stupid. So if you don't have it, I don't expect you to understand what I'm talking about. But trust me, Jesus is the answer to so many questions.
My prayer is that your pain will go away. I also pray that you'll find Jesus in this and that he'll comfort and strengthen you, as he continually does for me. I'm not sure when I'll blog next, so until that time, may you become more aware of Jesus in your life. More aware of how he wants you to be his. God bless.
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