I sit here thinking about what has helped my pain the most and it's an easy runaway. But before I reveal this, I need to get the business of journaling my pain out of the way. Yesterday was okay, despite mowing the lawn the day before. That really caused a lot of strain Tuesday night. But like I said, yesterday was good. I had a little pain when I did a lot of prolonged standing. And I didn't get my walk in which probably didn't help. But today I plan to walk. I am having that little spasm feeling behind my right testicle again today. So I don't think my bad cycle is quite over yet, but Lord willing, I'll get through this. Day by day, prayer by prayer.
Okay, now you may not agree with me on this and you may think I'm an ignorant so-and-so for saying this...but God has truly helped me the most. It seems like the older I get the more I realize how much I need him in my life. I don't want to get preachy, rather, I just want to explain how I've been able to deal with all this "stuff" in my life.
If there wasn't any hope for something better, then I would probably just go crazy. I would be consumed by "self", which is never a good thing. I've learned that the hard way over my lifetime. But having an eternal perspective coupled with real life experiences with God, makes one realize that his presence is very real; despite the naysayers.
I heard it put this way before: when a hunting dog is on point, he is the only one that knows the bird is in the bush over there. The hunters can't see the bird because the brambles are too thick and dense. But just because everyone else can't see it, it doesn't mean the bird isn't there. Because the dog is in tune with the bird and knows how to sense it. So the hunters instruct the dog to flush the bird so then everyone can see it.
That's how I feel with my faith. I feel like I'm in company with a bunch of other people who are in tune with the creator of the universe. We've adjusted our senses to see the signs and experience his presence. But we live with a bunch of other people who aren't tuned in and just think we're barking up the wrong tree. That doesn't make them bad people, just not tuned in people.
Well, I have had tons of experiences with God to know he's real. Everything from relationships to work. Even our move to the NW was filled with things that only God could work out. Despite my pain, I know he's there for me. To comfort me and lift me up. Trust me, there are days when I'm not sure I want to be comforted, but there he is anyway.
So if you want to know how I deal with all this pain and anguish, it's simply knowing that I have a loving God who cares for me. So much that he sent his only son, Jesus, to take my punishment for all the bad stuff I've done. The grace and love and mercy I've been shown by God is unbelievable.
I wasn't going to blog about this particular subject today, I was going to blog about vitamins, but it just seemed like maybe there is someone out there who needs to hear this. So if you are that one, remember God loves you. Jesus loves you. You will get through this. Maybe not the way you'd like or the way you hope, but you'll get through it. All courtesy of the Lord above who is just waiting for you to be tuned in to ask him for help.
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