Saturday, January 14, 2012

Not Much Has Changed

As you can tell by my title, I'm pretty status quo. I have pain, I don't have pain, I take tylenol, I cope, I hurt, I feel sorry for myself. It's a regular day at Disney World.

I bought one of those inflatable donuts to sit on. It helps me sit on hard surfaces better.

My wife and I were close last week after a real long time off. I found out she was afraid to be with me because she thought she might hurt me. I was having a lot of pain before we were together. Now I'm having a lot of pain afterwards. So I don't think ejaculations really affect me one way or another. Although, I could be wrong. I might be better to say, it didn't affect me this last time.

I spoke to my pain mentor a couple days ago. It was good to hear his voice. He provided some more insight, as usual. He's really helped me a lot.

Lately I've been considering a nerve surgery. It is supposed to deaden the nerves so you don't feel the pain anymore. But someone on the forum had an injection (which would be the preliminary step to the surgery) and now he has more pain than before the injection.

So I guess I am what I am. I probably won't have anymore surgeries, Lord willing. Also Lord willing, I hope I'll be able to have less pain. But it's been over a year now and that just doesn't seem like it's going to be a reality. But the Lord can heal me and make it easier. He's done it before. I would love it if he would do it for me. Wouldn't we all!

God does get me through the days though. I thank him for that. I hate having PVPS. I wish I had never had a vasectomy. But you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube, can you? So I'll just keep relying on Jesus and coping and dealing. I guess that's it for now.

Peace be with you and yours. May God bless you.

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